I've lost...well, my youth. Not that I am just noticing; this has been going on for quite a while. However, I am often surprised when I look in the mirror and see this person that I have become. The hair is gray. Wrinkles have deepened and multiplied. Glasses are essential. On and on. There is an unconscious part of me that still expects to see my thirtyish self in that truth-telling reflection, but the fact is that I am changing day by day into this new me. It's not bad; it just gives me a weird feeling in my gut that can almost take my breath away.
That's the outside...what everyone else can see and that I notice in others of my age group, but there is no mirror to my inside. Changes are ripening there as well. I've moved to a new-found appreciation of life and developed a mellowness that is expanding internally as the gray hairs multiply on my head. There is a richness and contentment to my life now that I was too busy to develop when I was fretting about my responsibilities and hectic schedule.
Now. It's a good place. But I don't look in the mirror as much as I once did.
Hmm . .just wrote a short story about the ravages of ageing but it's a little more negative than your perspective. I'm not dealing at all well with it frankly. Although I agree with that sense of'peace' on the inside or perhaps it's just resignation, can't do a damn thing about it anyway.
ReplyDeleteI see so much of Kasper in that picture of you. He's younger than you are there, but do you see it too? http://www.flickr.com/photos/jjustkidding/5538935374/. Eyes and nose, yeah?
ReplyDeleteAnd also? I currently am my thirtyish self, and I still have that reaction looking in the mirror. I am stunned that I am aging as quickly as my teeny children. I thought it was funny when it happend to my sisters, but less so now that it's me.
seriously somethings just get better with time...there are things to apprecaite at each age if we allow it...
ReplyDeleteWhat a cutie pie! I hear ya sister on this aging business. Hello crepey neck...
ReplyDeleteDelighted you're looking into Primal! I think my calculations for daily nutrients are more clearly stated in my blog than in the book - you can refer to that if you get in a pickle! Stephanie
ReplyDeletethat's a lovely picture :)
ReplyDeleteYou are such a youthful and beautiful woman. And, I understand the quandary of our knowing ourselves as a youngster and that of being an aging diva. We are still young!
ReplyDeleteOh, and I love your new look! Fantastic and so cool!
ReplyDeleteI live with that same mild sense of disbelief. Though I've always tried to remind myself when looking at an older person that they are still the same inside as they ever were, now that I am that "older person," I know that's not entirely true. There have definitely been some shifts in thinking and self-perception over the years.
ReplyDeleteLovely bllog you have here
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